I’ve nothing left but confusion and solitude and my aloneness. I’ve been thinking about life and what it is and what makes it. I don’t understand it.
This morning I cried thinking about the death of an eleven year old girl that was kidnapped in Sarasota. I thought about the person that killed her, took her away from her family, her friends… her life. I thought about life. What is life? That which can be taken away so easily, for no reason. What created man? What created beast? Did man create beast? For what reason, for what end? What makes a person kill? What makes a person a beast?
Have we come so far in our evolution? How far have we come? We have a video tape of a fragile young girl, and no way to get to her. We can see her, walking, talking, walking away… never to be seen again. We see her, and we cry. We can cry, and the power of our tears tears me apart.
What is death? When the killer dies, what is dying? Who is crying? Does the killer die? Does the killer deserve death? Does the killer deserve rights? What is right? What are the rights of the killer? The man or the beast? I can’t say I see where the rights lie (in the killers face)… I can see the killers face, on my television screen, flipping through endless channels, alone… watching death, seeing death, understanding death… I can’t understand this death. Where’s the point? There is no point. Where’s the reason? There is no reason.
So many questions posed now, after the death. Why? Why was the killer free to roam? Why was girl walking alone? How far have we come? Can we not walk through parking lots, in neighborhoods, through yards? Can we not ride our bicycles through familiar streets? Should we lock ourselves up for fear of the beast? Where does the answer lie? Is there an answer to lie?
So much blame to pass. Why was the girl walking alone? Why was the killer free? Why was the video tape rolling? There is no conclusion, in the end there is death. The death of innocence, the death of beauty… There is nothing but what there was, and what can never be again…
And on the television George W. speaks of intelligence, and weapons of mass destruction, and committees and this and that… and all of this in a country that lacks so much intelligence… a country that creates killers and creates martyrs and creates confusion and fear and turmoil… This, just another bit of propaganda, seeking another term, another 4 years of war.
The war is home now, and the victim is a child. The next victim had better be a man that preys on children, the next victim had better understand his own death, and not his life safely tucked away behind bars… living off tax money, living off death.
I can only offer the same sympathy that so many others have offered to the family and friends of this girl. I can only offer my prayers and thoughts. I can only dream of a world where things like this don’t happen. I can only wish for a brighter future.
God Bless.
